Self care is such a popular topic these days, and believe me, I. Am. Living. for it. The new Queer Eye is on Netflix, and the Fab Five are teaching people of the world how to love themselves, one complex soul at a time. I want there to be 365 episodes of that show so that I can peacefully fall asleep to the sound of utter positivity every night of the year. I want to absorb it through my TV while I sleep – that’s how osmosis works, right?
Putting the self care concept into practice…well, that part is not always so easy. Everybody has got a lot on their plate – some more than others. And it’s easy to hype up other people, and value them and their uniqueness, but it’s not as easy to do for yourself. Some of us even struggle with the basics of sleeping, eating, showering, and working out when we should, much less getting into the deeper caverns of self love and appreciation. Living your best life is easier said than done.
I recently saw some criticism of the new self care mentality as simply promoting capitalism and buying beauty products or other comfort items. However, that’s far from my understanding of it. To me, self care is mostly about the SELF part – knowing yourself and what you need and want, so obviously that’s going to be different for everyone.
For me, taking long baths with luxurious, cruelty-free face masks is actually a part of it…and maybe the occasional online shopping, and weirdly enough, playing Design Home on my iPad, which I haven’t played in months. For someone else, self care might be watching their favorite show, sitting outside for an hour, or getting up early to have a nice cup of tea. Basically you’re just looking for a few moments a day that are just for you, where you can find joy and reflect on your life. Take the time for yourself so that you have that much more energy to put forth later.
My last two weeks were really stressful personally – deployment, sick cat, busy work schedule, etc. I can probably count on one hand the number of times I brushed my hair. When did I eat last…what did I eat? It’s a blur. I think I might have even gone three weeks without doing my laundry. There was trash in my car, which strongly reflected the way I felt – like trash.
Even worse? I did little to nothing for my writer half. I didn’t read a single book even though I’ve been carrying one around in my purse for weeks. I didn’t work on critiques or querying or blogging (no surprise there). The only things I did write were required work-related tasks, and even then, I turned in a lot of those late. So all of this has got me asking:
How can I take better care of myself as a writer?
Where can I find those peaceful moments that I need to reflect and grow my creativity?
How can I rest when I need to rest and work when I need to work to maximize my productivity?
WHAT DO I DO?
____________________________________________________________________________________________
Self care phase two: my writerly self care plan.
The biggest part of my plan is making things become routine and part of my everyday habits, rather than goals I only accomplish once a month. Even if it’s just a couple minutes of reading or writing a day, I have a feeling it’s going to help. So I’ve made a list to get started and I encourage other writers to do the same if they think it will work for them!
- Write everyday. Even when I don’t want to. Even when what I’m writing sucks.
- Query at least an agent a week. My book is realistically never going to get published if I keep the super slow, almost nonexistent pace I’ve been going.
- READ. I’m still finding time logistically for this one – like maybe first thing in the morning or before bed? Or in the bathtub? I’m going to finish that novel in my purse this week or else I am unsubscribing from Hulu.
- Schedule out my social media. I like to keep up on relevant writing topics and such, but my author FB page and Twitter account have been basically dead for two weeks now. I need to have at least a month preplanned.
- Write what feels right. If I’m burned out on my fiction project, maybe I’ll write a Haiku. Maybe I’ll even write another blog post. I might surprise us all.
I’ve been told making a plan is half the battle, but I’ve still got my work cut out for me. Let’s see how it goes!
Fellow writers, I challenge you to consider your own writerly self care plan and what that means to you. Give me your ideas in the comments. And to everyone else, do the little things for yourself on a daily basis. You need them. Trust.
Kylie Peters, Author 